The Follow Files: Episode No. 1

What I learned about tennis on Twitter this week, and why the world will be a better place because of it.

There was snow in Moscow on January 29th. I know because Svetlana Kuznetsova tweeted such. "So nice...I'm going to practice," she said.

Meanwhile, in a galaxy far, far away, Gael Monfils was getting ready for — of all things — "bowling time."

Your guess is as good as mine on that one, but I am kind of into the mental imagery of Gael bowling. I can see him flying through the air as he lets go a tweener for a strike.

Just another normal week in the tennis twitterverse, where we die-hard tennis folks are always happy to bear witness to the latest bits of wit and wisdom bursting forth from the pda's of our globetrotting tennis icons.

"I hope Torres will not leave Liverpool," says Caroline Wozniacki, "he is such a great player." It was wishful thinking for Caroline, but we know if anyone dares to dream on the WTA Tour it is the Great Dane.

Sadly, it was all for naught. One day later, Torres was gone to Chelsea, with obscene amounts of money changing hands in the deal. As usual, Caroline displayed her ability to roll with the punches. "Need to get used to not seeing Torres in the red shirt anymore :( but I am sure Suarez and Carroll in front will be a good pair."

That's our Caroline, always seeing the bright side.

Oh, but hang on -- we interrupt this edition of "Football talk w/ Caro" for a public service announcement from recently retired Taylor Dent. No, he's not coming out of retirement for the Delray Beach tourney, but he does want us to know that he's going to stay involved with the sport. "I have been getting a lot of requests on the academy," he says. "denttennisacademy.com should give you all the info."

Thanks for that, Taylor. We miss you man!

Speaking of hard serving Americans, the legendary John Isner (legendary more for his appearance w/ Petkorazzi than the longest match of all-time these days) chimes in to tell us some bad news about a bulldog. "RIP UGA VIII. Damn good doawg. Sad day for the bulldog nation," he laments. Sad indeed, as UGAVIII was only 17 months old before lymphoma took his life.

On a lighter note, the second best quote of the Australian Open, in my humble opinion, came from that same long-limbed American, John Isner: "I won in 4, look at my big chest," said Isner, as Petko's camera lens caught him during a post-match warm-down with resistance bands. He wasn't done. "I'm a beast," he added, "am I turning you on?"

Petkovic, careful not to do anything to deflate the young giant, replied "a little bit."

Priceless. Almost as good as "I feel like I'm the backstreet boys," which was what Andrea Petkovic had to say about playing in the quarters of the Australian Open.

"Happy Chinese New Year to all my Chinese followers," says Kim Clijsters. I can't help thinking that maybe Stacey Allaster put Kim up to that. Stacey: 'Hey Kim, how about throwing those Chinese people a bone? They're pretty upset about what you did to Na in the 2nd and third sets last week.'

"I hope u are good," says our good buddy Gael Monfils, when clearly it is us who should be wishing him well after his thrashing at the hands of Stan Wawrinka in Melbourne. Still, Gael seems adamant. He's interested in us. And he doesn't like the silence. "I hope u are doing good in your life," he adds, as if we didn't see his first tweet.

Gael, I'm doing fine. We all are. But we miss you. Where have you been since Melbourne?

"I had a good training session at P3 sport and science lab," he says. Evidently he took a photo of the wall too.

"On my way to San Jose."

Right on, see you there Gael.

Speaking of San Jose, Ivo Karlovic will be wreaking his unique brand of havoc on the draw at the SAP Open next week. He's already in town, and he's watching the Superbowl. "Today I'm watching #superbowl," he says. "P.S. what are the rules?"

Far across the globe, Vera Zvonareva reminds us all that you don't need anything more than yourself to have a good time.

Amen to that!

Now that you've read this, don't you feel that the world is a better place? I kind of do.